Just when I think I am going to take some much needed rest from all this running, I realize that I have to start the whole process all over again! Guess what? I'm a little tuckered today.
Today I decided that I needed some downtime. I was going to make room for it no matter what! I planned to do it the minute I put Lily on the bus this morning, but then I saw some much needed gardening that needed some attention. So instead, I put on my gardening gloves.
After finishing my project in the garden, I decided that it was time, time to do nothing and headed for the door. I knew I was going to find my "Calgon moment" in the warmth of my clean and tidy living room. Walking toward the door to my house, I passed my car in the garage and remembered that I had to get it inspected because my registration was expiring. So I hopped in the car instead and headed to the closest Jiffy Lube. After the inspection, I thought, "Well since I am out, I should get some more things done." So, I ran to Whole Foods to get a few items that I can't get at a regular grocery store. Then I ran into Target and got a prescription filled. The entire time I scolded myself and said, "You need to rest!" Realizing the time, I beelined it for home and met Lily's school bus just in time. I fed her some lunch, took the dog out for a little play time with Lily, and then put both of them down for a much needed nap.
Finally at 2:47 pm, I decided to read a book. A book that has taken me a month to read! It made me sleepy, so I reached for the remote. TV in the middle of the day?! Scandalous! I stared at it for an hour. For a whole hour! I just completely shut down and relaxed. It felt good. Then I got sleepy and felt my body seeping further and further into the couch. As I was about to enter into the land of cotton candy and fluffy clouds, guilt crept in interrupting my much needed nap. Responsibilities started burrowing into my brain and told me that my time was up and it was time to get back to being productive. I grabbed the remote and hit the "off" switch. I don't even remember what I was watching, anyway.
As I type, I am preparing some vegetarian meatloaf for dinner tonight. While I cook the onions, I'll write a little on my blog and think about everything I have accomplished in the span of just a few days. In spite of the exhaustion, I am happy to be where I am at this time in my life. Never in a million years would the "Single Kym" have thought that this is what being a stay-at-home-mom entailed. My thinking was that I would FINALLY get a full 8 hours of sleep, be able to visit with my friends any old day, and go to the gym whenever I pleased. I was a funny girl back then.
So, I continue on with my journey into the land of being a mother and a wife. A time of being responsible and a little sleep deprived are well worth the happiness my family brings to me. In the meantime, I will watch out for this body of mine and I will relish in the time that I have set aside just for me. This life is nothing like what I had ever imagined when I was still single. Yet I am at peace, albeit a little tired, but I am satisfied and I am loved.
One day, I know things and events will slow down, and then, maybe then, I'll get that downtime I have been dreaming of for so long. Until then, I will take my moments of sporadic rest and call it good. Of course, only after I finish dinner, feed my family, take Lily and our dog on a walk and finally fold that laundry that has been sitting in my dryer for far too long.
